As a foster parent, your role goes beyond supporting the children in your care—it extends to supporting their families as a whole. Collaborative partnerships between foster caregivers and a child’s family can help promote timely reunification, improve family engagement, build protective capacities in parents or caregivers, and strengthen child safety and well-being.
Child Welfare Information Gateway conducted a series of interviews with birth and foster parents—many of whom are with either the Birth Parent National Network (BPNN) or the Birth and Foster Parent Partnership (BFPP)—to help dispel some of the myths each may hold about the other. This factsheet shares their thoughts and advice and highlights partnership opportunities. Interviewees’ names have been changed to protect their identities.
BUILDING RELATIONSHIPS FROM THE START
Building connections with a child’s birth parents and keeping communication open and honest from the start can help establish a strong and ongoing partnership. Everyone benefits when family members, children, and foster caregivers collaborate effectively and actively support the reunification process.
Foster caregivers should adopt a strengths-based perspective, recognizing and building upon parents’ existing support networks, such as extended family members, community connections, cultural groups, and friends. Parents who feel supported by foster caregivers and their existing networks will have more resources to help them build on their strengths and resilience. These parents are better equipped to provide their children with the love and connections essential for healthy development.
One strategy to begin a collaborative relationship between birth parents and foster caregivers is through “icebreaker meetings.” Icebreaker meetings” are facilitated conversations designed to introduce parents and caregivers and share information about the child. The conversation centers around the child’s needs, routines, likes, dislikes, and any special considerations such as the child’s medical history, family dynamics, communication expectations, and contact arrangements. Icebreaker meetings also provide foster caregivers with an opportunity to share more about themselves, their family, and their home. While icebreaker meetings alone do not create a collaborative relationship, they are a good first step.
These resources offer additional tips to help build and sustain relationships between birth families and foster caregivers:
- Birth and Foster Parent Partnership: A Relationship Building Guide
- How Foster and Birth Parents Can Work Together Toward Reunification
COMMUNICATE EARLY AND OFTEN
Unless contact is not allowed, foster caregivers should meet members of the child’s family as early as possible, even on the initial day of placement, to exchange essential information about the child and to help ease any worries while their child is in foster care. Imagine how you would feel if you were in the parents’ shoes and think about what you would want to know about the people caring for your child.
The case plan may determine the nature and frequency of contact with the child’s family. When permitted, regular check-ins through emails, phone calls, texts, photo sharing, etc., can help birth parents and other family members feel closer to their children, build trust with you, and encourage reunification. Keeping in touch with family is also important for children as it helps them maintain their sense of identity, belonging, and stability; minimizes feelings of grief and loss due to separation; preserves connections to their background; and can contribute to better well-being outcomes.